Counterfeit Gerbil

“Best price, best price!” He said it so often, the ridges inside his mouth had become red and sore as he rolled the “r” in “price.” But it was a living. #CounterfeitGerbil had put his two gerblits through college on the back of knock-off plastic balls and exercise wheels. They looked like the real deal, but would inevitably fall apart after a few uses, shortly after his tourist victims had flown home, so he never had to deal with their complaints... but something had changed lately. Business was slowing down. It seemed like fewer and fewer gerbils wanted his products. The customers he did see in the night market would pull out their phones as they shopped, but he wasn’t sure what they were doing with them, exactly. He’d shout, “no photo, no photo!” The newspaper came in the mornings, but #counterfeitgerbil would never read it before he shredded it with his sharp, yellow teeth and added it to his bed. If he had, he would’ve realized that his prospective customers had wised up. Quality products were now embedded with chips that could be scanned. If the product was authentic, it would show up on the blockchain. Since then, knock-off products were no longer in demand. Three weeks later, as he stood behind his booth at the market with a frown on his face, the cops rolled in. It was a crackdown. They cuffed his little hands and took him away. “This is bullshit,” he shouted. “Bullshit!” The earth turned and the sun rose, over a smoggy, humid cityscape. Another block was found, another transaction recorded for all eternity. The world had moved on without him; #CounterfeitGerbil had traded his cage… for a cell.

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@NonFunGerbils The #CounterfeitGerbil wanted to collect yet another piece from one of his favorite writers. So he threw in a half-written tweet in a hurry to secure the glorious price

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@NonFunGerbils #CounterfeitGerbil He's a fugazi. He's a whazy. He's a woozie. He's fairy dust. He doesn't exist. He's never landed. He is not matter. He's not on the elemental chart. He's not fucking real.

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Counterfeit gerbil had a foolproof plan. Firing up her screenshot app she copied and glitched a few gerbils… Now she just needed to slap on some coin logos, think of a cool sounding pseudonym, and mint her fortune…. Hmmmm ‘non-fun-unicorns’? That will work. These noobs fall for it every time.

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#counterfeitgerbil #nonfungerbils @nonfungerbils He thought long and hard about what story he should tell his blind date. Counterfeitgerbil was always a man of few words, but he really wanted to impress her. "I created bitcoin" he said, as he checked the price of BGV

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1/2 #counterfeitgerbil There once was a counterfeit gerbil For some reason he was non-verbal His friend was a hen loved a cock she called Ben But she often would cheat with a squirrel 2/2 There once was a counterfeit gerbil Rode to work on the back of a turtle The turtle’s name Myrtle She was mighty fertile And Counterfeit Gerbil now dodges child support payments and is addicted to crack. It’s unfortunate, but these things happen.

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@NonFunGerbils @dappwizard @Werekitty1 @TechnikoArt @NateAlex6677 "That's no moon," he said in muted shock as they got close enough to make out that it was in fact ... furry. #counterfitgerbil

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1/4 The crypto gerbil world was doing amazing and others did not see that. It was way ahead of it’s time and they did not understand the power it had they did not understand that it would take over the world. 2/4 in-order to buy, exchange, sell, and transfer crypto. 3/4 Regulations. The government decided that that was not all they could do so they decided, let’s create our own and control it so they did they created a crypto currency and called it counterfeitgerbilcoin it was controlled by the government you had to have a counterfeitgerbilcoin 4/4 There were gerbils that decided that if they controlled it they would be able to control almost everything. The government was one of those gerbils. They decided that they would play with everyone’s cryptogerbils so they created limits on the things that people could do.

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